If we're being honest, before Sunday afternoon I had some small glimmer of hope that I'd still make the playoffs this year. That was until Crop informed me that the lowest 4 teams don't make cut. I thought it was lowest 2 - because while I don't really care (i.e. DJ's Rudy-esque rant in last week's newsletter about how this league matters made me want to punch him in the mouth)- historically I've made the playoffs only to lose in the first round. So despite my recent resurgence, looks like I'll be on the outside looking in this year. So let's get this over with. I have to tend to two kids being neglected by their father until week 16.
The Uncle Charlie's #Itjusttastesbetter (artist formerly known as the JJJS) award- Antonio Brown. For his insane performance this week and in the aforementioned commercial. I much prefer it to the Hines Ward C. Harper or Bettis S & T bank commercials. If those guys could make ballon animals I'd hire them for Marlo's next birthday party. Cause apparently in this region you hire an athlete for $200 and some VIP tickets to Matrix.
Bench bomb- alright I've spend a considerable amount of time studying benches and there isn't a clear bench bomb. So now I'm just mad about wasting my time. Fun fact: TBS's bench beat WOL this week. And Taco has more cats than I had active players on my bench. Hooray!
Stud of the week- Is this a serious question? TBS. And that's I'll I'm gonna write. Because dominance is boring. I'm just happy to get this damn trophy out of my house. Honorable mention to Pav- good work. Don't let your dreams be dreams!
Willy Lowman- Wicked of Lately. I don't even know what happened here. But I think you meant to do that. And my fragile FF ego thanks you.
Do better chair- I picked up a kicker that didn't kick this week. When did I notice? Sunday at 3. I feel shame.
Crop, you're up. I'll mentally prepare myself for all the penis analogies.
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